The Pleasures of Intimacy
by Wintermoth1223
Summary: When the night comes and ale passes round, the Dwarfs and the Hobbit are prone to stories. A drunken Bilbo finds a new kind of love with Bofur, and Thorin turns out to like elves. The confusing tale of romance, seduction, and elfen fetishes. Warning: Contains Adult Themes (Bilbo/Bofur)(Thorin/Elrond)
1. Chapter 1

The company; absent of the aged wizard, ate silently within the gullet of a narrow cavern. At the mouth of their lodging place Bofur sat playing a rhythm-less tune on his hand pipe. The small bone whittled instrument pipped and squeaked, and seemed almost shrill beneath the cries of a strong winter storm. The deluge soaked Bofur's boots despite their thin tar coating, and the fur of his hat was frosted with water droplets. From behind, the shivering dwarf caught the ever sweet smell of musk, fire wood, and deer meet, coupled with a light hearted conversation that he longed desperately to join. He felt the tug of Bombur's laughter at a snide comment made by Dwalin. And he all but lunged off his high seated perch when Fili called him a whimsy-minded woman. But his whole body jerked, and the hand pipe fell with a crack to the ground when he caught site of Bilbo releaving himself behind a nearby boulder. At the crash of the pipe the halfling, startled mid stream, looked up to see the older man trying desperately not to look at him. Embarrassed, Bilbo tried to avoid the obvious situation by speaking to Bofur. "Have you eaten, I've made stew and rock cakes, they're very good. Even used some berries in them, that's the cakes not the stew. Haha!" Finally after a long silence the small Hobbit pulled up his trousers and patted away. "God, he is such an ugly thing, but there is such an air of femininity to him that I actually want to...ew!" Bofur mumbled to himself for a while before he was relieved by Oin, who sat at the base of the great rock face on a dry patch of lime stone. "Go join the party and drink a little mead on me, ay!" the older dwarf smiled, picked up the hand pipe, and began to puff out a thin tune that sounded great a deal like the "Aisles of Bristles."

At the now dieing fire Bofur took a bowl of stew and sat quietly to watch the movement of his comrades. To his right Fili was talking animatedly with several of the others about their past sexual exploits. "I banged her so hard she cried, true story I swear!" Ori laughed at the end of a long winded tale of a night in a dwarven brothel craked out by a very intoxicated Gloin, "Yeah, and I fucked her so hard she sang the epic ballad of Kern." "Bull you little pip!" Kili pushed the young dwarf off of his log and turned to face the others at the fire side. "Story of my first foursome, you won't believe it. There were two dwarvish slaves in the Blue Mountains who knew this human from Togier. We went to my place, and well..." suddenly the whole room fell silent as Thorin stood and moved across the makeshift hearth. "And then they all wanted you and yada yada yada, god we have all heard this story at least three times, and every time the moaning gets louder. Uh, I really didn't mean to say that, had too much mead is all. Good night!" The king slowly slunk off behind several large boulders and the crude sex stories continued until Barlin turned to the drowsy Bilbo and asked "So when was the last time you had a woman?" "I um, well, I don't talk of such things since my people view sex as a bond and not simply an act." "Well we see it as a bond too, but we do it for pleasure too!" Kili laughed and sat next to Bilbo, simultaneously spilling mead down the Hobbits front. "Oh, sorry Bilbo, I think I may have had a little to much to drink. Never the less our people view sex in recreation and procreation, and we are often intimate with varying races and genders. Why when we was in Rivendale I saw Thorin being quite intimate with the Elfen king...hahaha it was very commical 'casue Thorin is so stocky and has a huge, well you know, and the elf is so thin and he was so rough with the king. I got so..." The conversation stopped as several of the dwarfs began to call Kili a lire. "I aint lien, just ask Thorin, I'm sure he would tell yeah, I mean he saw me as he left the bedroom and he asked me to come by anytime and he would show me how the elves liked it best." Everyone began to get angry then, even Bilbo gave a great irritated humph and the dwarfs began to leave each calling Kili a lire and throwing their last dregs of mead at him.

The only people who remained were Kili, Bofur, and Bilbo who were now awkwardly quiet. "I um like blokes sometimes." said Bofur scratching his head. "Suppose its just nice to be with someone that knows the sweet spots and who can be more...uh." His face fell as Kili began to get up, "Good night boys, sleep well and wake refreshed," He tossed his mug to the ground and moved sluggishly across the harth, then stumbled back into the cave waving to Bofur with a sheepish grin. "So you like men?" asked the very drunk Bilbo. "Yeah, little more than I like women to be honest. Guess men is more readily available in situations like the one we is in now, with war and all." He looked at Bilbo who was teetering on the edge of his seat and nodding over enthusiastically. "I never been with anyone except my right hand, hehehe!" "You ever wanted to be with a man?" Bofur was feeling really uncomfortable now, and Bilbo too looked sheepish as he began to kick dirt into the pale light of the glowing coals. "I never thought about it one way or the other, recon I might try it once in my life just to see if I like it...you know." he peered at Bofur though a haze of mead and something warm that lapped at his mind like a dream. "You should ask Bofur to have sex with you," the hazy dream whispered. "Bofur, you like men right, and I want to try this man thing some time, so would you like..." His voice was cut off by hot breath against his face, and a damp boot toe nudging into his calf. "I have wanted you for so long Mr. Bagins, a burglar, or what ever you are." He moved to kiss Bilbo gently but the mouth of the Hobbit was so sweet with mead and so soft from disuse that he felt a strong lust force him to be rough and uneasy. His gloved hands held the tender face of the halfling as their lips moved unevenly, tongues spilling into the hot precipices of each others mouths. Bilbo's hands went up, searching for something to hold onto as his head grew faint from lack of breath. His tiny palms found the soft hair of Bofur's beard, and the flushed flesh of his ears, but he was at a loss for where the dwarfs chest was, so he grasped the beard for dear life.

"Tiny Hobbit, I don't know why but my heart has yearned for you since the night we first met, when you were grumpy and pouty, running about your house like a frightened mouse. " Bofur pulled back from the kiss, leaving Biblo's lips extremely puffy and red. "I can't explain my feelings but they seem more an interest in sex than anything else. Is that okay with you?" he looked down at Bilbo, not wishing to hear a negative response. "Um, I don't know Bofur, but all I can say is right now I want to be close to your skin and feel every inch of you body against me." he blushed a deep scarlet and turned away. "I don't even know how this man on man thing works...where does my penis go and where does yours go, and what if I get scared or cum too early?" he was suddenly fearfully aware of his inexperience."Well you can be inside me or I can be inside you, or we can just touch each other, or what ever comes naturally." the dwarf removed his scarf and heavy woolen coat, then boots, socks, and hat. "Tell me about one of your sexual exploits with a man, just so I know what to expect." Bilbo looked warily at Bofur for a moment, still very unsure of the logistics of their intercourse. "Sure, while I undress." He pulled off several layers of chainmale and cotton before beginning. "When I was very young; and mind you I have always been sexually interested in men, I met a dwarf from the great valley who had the most beautifully long blonde hair you have every seen. He and I met at a tavern and went to my room for a bottle of Dwarfen ale. He confessed an attraction for me, and before you know it we were on the floor kissing and ripping off armor and clothes. He was on top of me in a matter of seconds, slipping his fingers into my rectum with feverish speed. I remember gasping at the first and nearly fainting at the third, then he was out. It took no time at all for him to position himself behind me. Then he pushed in, quite too roughly really, and he gripped my groin and bit at my neck while he thrusted into me. His name was Morloh or something, and he hit my sweet spot with every thrust. I came after him and he left me on the floor in a pool of my own cum. He was not very knd or gentle, but he was great never the less." Bofur was now sitting on the log facing the fire, ruffing his hands over the rough wool fabric of his pant legs. Bilbo turned to him and let his head fall onto the dwarf's bare shoulder. "Sounds scary and uncomfortable to be honest." he pippled. "I will be gentle with you hobbit, and I will not leave you with a bottom full of my extracts."


	2. Chapter 2

Bofur gently let his hand fall onto Bilbo's lap and massaged the soft flesh of the Hobbits thigh. "I want you to touch me Bilbo, right here and just treat it like it were your own." He lifted the halflings hand to the thin fabric of his under clothing and let it fall onto the hot flesh of his rising erection. Bilbo began to panic, blood rushed in his ears causing him to fumbled strangely with the lump of hot flesh between his fingers. "Come here," Bofur gently lifted Bilbo onto his over sized feet and began to undress him; first the shirt, followed by small kisses, then the under shirt, then the pants and finally the thick woolen under garment that was worn by all Hobbits with its intricate bead work and finely stitched pattern of daisies. The dwarf's hand loosely fondled Bilbo, flicking his slowly erecting penis lightly with his thumb. "Be casual, like your meeting a new friend, but polite enough to ensure he stays in your company." Bofur let his head lean down to the Hobbit's groin, and very slowly blew hot air nto the covered flesh, then he dry licked the shaft and pulled the fabric away. The dwarf was unfamiliar with Hobbit anatomy and had never seen such an incredible penis before. Its head was a soft pink, unlike the dark blood blue tips of dwarfs and the deep red of elves, and its shaft was veined with blue, green, and an odd cascade of tattooing in the shape of flowers, plants, and spirals. "Beautiful..." Bofur lipped and slowly let his fingers touch the ornate sex organ. "Its done when we are very young," Bilbo blushed and at the same time could not control his hips as they arched into the dwarf's touch. "Can I see yours'?" he grinned uneasily at his body's eagerness. "Sure," Bofur stood before Bilbo and let his undergarment fall to the ground. For Bilbo who was used to his own small arousal, the massive deep colored thing before him, with its curly hair and braiding, made him incredibly scared. He felt like he was facing an ork or a great beast of some foreign land. "Wow, its huge and so dark." reaching out a shaky hand Bilbo touched its swollen head, the foreskin still stretching at its base, and he felt the move of muscle as his palm kneaded it gently. Then something inside him, a feral thing that made him growl in his gut and move steadily onward, forced his mouth open and onto hot flesh, mind the mouth being so small its first taste was not very much, not even the full head. Never the less the reaction was palpable as Bofur gasped and fell to his seat gripping the small shoulders of his friend as he pushed him back. "No, no, that is dangerous with dwarfs because we buck our hips, and I would seriously injure you if that happened." Bilbo looked embarrassed and kissed Bofur lightly on the cheek, "I'm sorry." "Not your fault, plus I wasn't expecting such an interest in mouth play. Lets take this slowly and I'll lead you okay." Bofur picked up their clothes and lead Bilbo from the hearth and down a small winding rocky path through the cavern, where he hoped they would find privacy.

The dark room beyond smelt heavily of mold and living things, and it was terribly cold and wet. Bilbo clung tightly to the dwarf, and when Bofur threw their clothes onto the black space beyond, their was a loud floppy splash. Both men knew that they had come to an under ground pool. Bilbo looked around and turned to Bofur with an animated grin "We can do whatever we want here, what ever, what ever."He was so happy that without thinking he splashed into the water and disturbed a patch of something terribly slimy at the edge of the monstrous lake. Suddenly the whole body of water began to glow and throb, and the patch that Bilbo had stepped on scuttled into the water. "Fungus or bugs that glow, imagine that." With these last words the dwarf lifted the hobbit into his arms and set him lightly on the stone floor. Then the two began to kiss , slowly at first but as their mouths opened excitedly their actions became more ferocious. Both creature lips smashed together, their breaths hitched, and their hands clung to what bits of each other they could reach. Their hips bucked, even the Hobbit's inexperienced body knew what it wanted, and with every flash of the dwarfs tongue the small beast inside him made his hind go incredibly foggy. "I'm sorry." Bofur broke them apart and let his hands trail the smooth face of the halfling, then melt down his chest and hips, thighs and calfs, and down to the brown curly hair of feet. With wet bruised lips the dwarf took one of Bilbo's toes in his mouth and licked it softly, then another, and another. He finished with a loud pop on Bilbo's right pinky-toe, and then he turned his eyes straight onto the mass of hard flesh between the Hobbit's thighs. He moved slowly and uncertaintly to it, and with an ever so slight groan his mouth closed around the Hobbit's shaft. "Bofur, um, oh, uh...uh,uh,nnnha, mmmph." Biblo was going to say that he didn't want to kiss after this, considering where the dwarfs mouth was now lapping and sucking, but the suction and sharp touches drained all thoughts from his mind and he could do nothing but moan.

"Ah, stop Bofur stop!" he cried out as an uncontrollable wave of shivers came over his body and he felt like he was going to cum. Drawing back the dwarf looked a little concerned, "are you okay Bilbo?" "Yes, just going to cum..." he trailed off looking embarrassed. "Do you want to try anal sex?" the question hung loosely, as though it were suspended in the deepest part of the lake. Finally, after a great and very uneasy silence, when the chill of the room was batting their bodies Biblo smoothly replied, "I didn't realize that that was what you meant by entering each other. I can try but I don't know what I should look for in trying to pleasure you." He turned toward the now dimming waters and blushed deeply, fondling himself in hesitation. "Well, um, huh, well lay down and I'll show you" Bofur helped Biblo onto his back and spread the halflings legs apart before lifting them over his shoulders. It was a very odd position Biblo thought, and it made his stomach ache, but it was perfect, for as the dwarf pressed a lightly moistened finger into his bottom he could bare down freely. "Right here, this little bump in your intestinal wall, its called the prostate and it creates a feeling of sexual pleasure when it's pressed." Bofur poked it several times, receiving an encouraging "hup" and hiccup of breath each time. "But how do I find it?" they both looked at each other for a long time, until Bofur turned over on his hands and knees and lifted his bottom into the air. "Just feel around with your finger." Bilbo felt uncomfortable and out of place as he lifted himself onto his knees and peered at the slowly opening and closing sphincter muscles of the dwarfs bottom. It wasn't just the bottom but the contrast in their persons that made him uneasy; Bilbo was thin and unmuscular with a slightly protruding stomach, while his partner was a stocky lean mean machine with muscles that had muscles, a very intimidating image. The Hobbit sucked slightly on his finger and pressed in, wriggling it around he had to search and search for the small pressure point but at last he found it and the dwarf groaned lewdly in response. He didn't know how his penis was going to fit into the small ring of muscle, but he would try. Spitting into his palm Bilbo rubbed himself down and positioned his hips. After guiding the head into the incredibly small space he stopped and waited for Bofur to respond. When no voice came he pressed in farther, trying to remember the little bump's location.

Once he was all the way inside he felt the darkness in the back of his mind tell him to thrust, but he wanted to find the spot so he drew out and in several times until the body beneath him let out a sharp hiss of breath. Again he drew out and then plunged in, over and over and over, each time a new sound fell from Bofur's lips until the creature was speaking in dwarfish as he lost all will for the common language. Bilbo felt great, not only because he was pleasuring Bofur but because every time he thrust in the ring of muscle clenched in a ripple of movement across his shaft. He too was moaning and grunting, and with ever slap of flesh on flesh both men were getting louder and louder. Bilbo felt it coming, a shiver here and there, and suddenly he wanted to be very close to Bofur and so he stopped thrusting and leaned over the mass of man beneath him clasping his chest. "Don't stop." Bofur groaned, but he liked the feeling of the tiny hands on his nipples and chest. Suddenly Biblo got an idea, and he let his hands fall to the dwarfs erection. This time he did not fumble and instead gripped it tightly and pumped starting up an even tempo as his hips began to thrust again. "Gaaaah" Bofur came with the third thrust and spilled his secretions into and over the Hobbit's hands. Biblo pressed into the dwarfs bottom several more times before releasing himself and falling hard against Bofur's back.


End file.
